Monday, February 20, 2012

Political Insanity

OUCH!! MY HEAD HURTS!!
I have been wanting to get my act together enough to just comment on today's Republican Party and their candidates. Now that I have curtains, I can proceed with this screed! Cause I feel the need that is not being satisfied with the media or anyplace elese for that matter...but I digress..My big head hurts and I need it bad!
 I am just stupefied that BIRTH CONTROL of all Fu*%ing issues is now controversial. I mean didn't we as a society come to a consensus that birth control and contraception is GOOD THING??
Oh but NO,  because President Obama is calling for birth control to be paid for by private insurance we have jackasses telling women to put aspirin between their legs. Well, for the love of my dear Grandmother, what the hell is going on here? Why is the media not calling them out on this shit?
I mean Rick Santorum is questioning the ENTIRE concept of public education and he is the F-ing FRONT RUNNER in the Republican primary.
Help me give them some meds please or I just need to beg them to take mine!!
I mean the Republican primary voter goes though the man of the month club like some go though flirting or speed-dating (I never did the speed dating thing).  I mean it went Trump, Buchanan, Perry,  Gingrich,  and now Rick Santorum. I mean PLLEEEEESSEE....!! Stop this merry-go-round, I want to get off.......to Florida and go  to Spring Training.

Well, this rant about the politics of this 2012 is just  minor league compared to this on written by Jim Wright and his blog Stonkettle Station. He goes off on this Republican field in most descriptive way and with colorful and exciting use of the English language without getting laid! Here is just part of this funny and spot on remarks:
The absurd amount of paint-chip eating, baboon faced, nose picking, dimwitted verbal diarrhea in this election season is fast approaching a level of frothy double-thinking stupidity that even an avowed political junkie like yours truly finds simply astounding. During the Super Bowl, an American icon narrates a commercial about optimism and bringing jobs back to a depressed American city and buying a Chrysler – and the noose and torch waving extremists led by Karl Rove go absolutely monkey shit, accusing Clint Eastwood, Clint The Man With No Name Eastwood for fuck’s sake, of shilling for President Obama and being anti-American. Clint Eastwood. Because, optimism, you see, is obviously a communist plot by Muslim Bilderberg Illuminati to save one of the largest remaining American industries and a couple million jobs in the Midwest in order to destroy capitalism, kill Jesus, bring about the New World Order, and turn our internal organs into a tasty nacho cheese flavored paste, or something, maybe, I’m a little hazy on the details, whatever. The important thing is that only gun lovin’ war mongerin’ Jesus humping rightwing extremists can be patriots. Optimism equals Liberalism equals terrorism, that’s a tip from Homeland Security, kids, write it down. Also, Clint Eastwood obviously hates the Jesus and he’s probably gay, somebody check the bumper of his Prius for a Jebus Fish. (Aside: you ever notice how Karl Rove bears a really striking physical resemblance Major Toht, the creepy Gestapo guy from the first Indiana Jones movie? What? I’m just saying it’s a weird coincidence is all. No, no, never mind, I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about). Republican Funnyman Mitt Romney condemned Obama’s bailout of Detroit, but then immediately explained how he, himself, as president no less, wouldn’t have let “automakers be liquidated” – despite personally penning a piece in the November 2008 New York Times entitled (and I quote) “Let Detroit Go Bankrupt” (and I unquote). Everybody clear on that? If Obama bails out Detroit, it’s anti-American socialist cheese making with ass-buggery by Clint Eastwood. But if Romney, the guy who made two hundred million dollars by liquidating companies and who specifically said in writing that automakers should go bankrupt but now says he was just kidding, ha ha, if he says he would have bailed out Detroit, well, sir, that’s, um, well, not socialism. I guess it depends on why you bailed out Detroit. Do it to save two million American blue collar jobs, it’s socialism. Do it to make grotesquely rich CEOs and white collar venture capitalists even more grossly richer, it’s double-plus extra special American cheeseburgers with sparkly bald eagles on top shooting red white and blue bottle rockets out of their assholes while the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders sing a Country and Western version of God Bless America. Remember, folks, ObamaCare = OMFG! Nazis! RomneyCare = uh, well, ur, OMFG! Look over there! Clint Eastwood is totally ass raping Jesus! And he hates puppies! And white people! It’s Twue! When it comes to oral gymnastics, Mitt Romney is far more gifted than Linda Lovelace ever was. If politics doesn’t work out for him, he should seriously consider hardcore porn. For Romney, it’s basically the same thing and you don’t have to wear a tie – unless it’s the Horny Governor and the Nympho Intern script. Yesterday, Congressional Conservatives just gave up. John Boehner threw in the towel. Fuck it. Fine. Keep your stupid un-American payroll tax cuts. Fine, just fine. Make Jesus cry. Jerks. Whatever. Stupid voters. Boehner himself was nearly in tears because congressional republicans, after fighting tooth and nail for tax breaks for the wealthiest 2% of Americans, were being blamed for wanting to raise Social Security withholdings on the middle class. Boehner felt it was just so monumentally unfair of Democrats to take advantage of the Republicans’ clearly stated position during an election year, because, of course, Boehner himself would never ever do such a thing. No Sir. Nope. Never. The Speaker shouldn’t have worried, like my friend up above there are still plenty of loyal Kool-Aid drinkers. Take Douglas the Yahoo Commenter: Obama doesn't want to help the MIDDLE CLASS , he wants to GIVE MORE to the LEECHES !!! [sic] Apparently we’re now defining leeches as those Americans (and non-Americans) who have jobs and pay taxes. See, what we are in point of fact talking about here, by definition, are payroll tax breaks. Payroll tax breaks. Payroll. Pay. Roll. Payroll tax breaks. The idea is you get less taken out of your paycheck (an amount equal to about one small tank of gas per month if you want to get specific about it). Generally, you have to have a job to get a paycheck in order to have FICA withheld. We’re now calling those people “leeches,” please note the change and use the term appropriately in official communication.
Now That is political commentary we can use. Great and funny as hell
'I now must go to sleep and dream of more  pleasurable things that will come my way assuming I do not do a brain fart and go "OOPS" like Rick Perry!! Its time to go.

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